Special Love

My friend, Maggie, gave me something special today - a quilt and a covered book for journalling my cancer journey.
The quilt was made by ladies who are members of Victoria's Quilts Canada - whose ministry is to provide quilts to people with cancer. The back side of the quilt is flannel - a warm fabric to snuggle under during chemo treatments. The verse that the ministry offers to people with cancer is from Joshua 1:9 - "Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go." As a symbol of hope, the ladies (machine) embroidered a dove in the corner.

The journal book is in a cover that depicts "our home"  - a cottage in the woods and surrounded by my gardens.

Thank you, Maggie! You are a special friend!

As a post-script to this, John and I are going to the Cancer Clinic in Kingston on Tuesday, for a consult with the medical oncologist (chemo doctor) as well as with the radiologist. On Thursday, I will be going into surgery again: the pathologists stated that although the margins of the tissue removed on May 5 were clear, the margins were not wide enough, and want to see more removed. This will delay treatments a couple of weeks; hopefully on Tuesday, we'll find out by how much.

In the Merry Month of May....

It's been an eventful month!

1. Surgery was on the 5th: 1 lump and 4 lymph nodes were removed. We know that the lymph nodes are clear, but everything has gone for a second scrutiny, and so we're still in limbo. It isn't easy waiting.

2. John's pickup broke down on the way home from work one evening. Too late to rent a dolly to tow it home, he got a ride home, but when he returned early in the morning - it was gone! My car didn't pass its emission test, and so now it's getting a new exhaust system. The thought going through our minds last week was: what's next??

3. I did reasonably well at the yard sale held at the church; it helped pay for the machine quilting of Mom's quilt.

4. David, Stephanie and Anneke came for the long weekend, and on Saturday, Naomi, Petra and Rachel were here, too, while Stevin and Katrina spent a couple of hours in emerg. taking care of a scratch to Katrina's eye. (It's healing well, thankfully.) It was a delightful weekend, and the weather cooperated beautifully! Saturday suppertime was the time we celebrated my birthday - with Dutch appeltaart and whipped cream, and jello with marshmallows for the girls. I received a gift certificate from all of my children - Reitman's here I come!

5. On Sunday, we had a quick photo-shoot of Anneke ----

6. On Monday, Anneke tried out Opa's hammock.....7. And on Tuesday, (today) I gave Mom the completed quilt. It looks great on her bed, and she really likes it.

Easter Treasure Hunt

A New Journey

By now, most of you know my latest and newest adventure: it's the C word.

I found out this week that I have Early Stage Breast Cancer. The good news is that it's Early.

Surgery day is May 5 when a lumpectomy and a sentinal node biopsy will be done. That biospy will indicate which lymph nodes need to be removed, if any. And May 5 is the first day a doctor from Kingston is available to monitor the procedure.

My surgeon said that treatments have advanced very quickly over the last few years, and it has been found that that a lumpectomy for early stage, followed by radiation and chemo, provides sufficiency for life expectancy. That's good news, too.

In the meantime, I am wondering about my immediate future. Do I keep working? What about income?

The one word that has been placed on my heart and mind is: TRUST.

My faith has always been a strong part of me, but I think that God is walking through this adventure with me so that I can learn a new aspect of trust and faith and peace. Is there any other reason He allows new trials?

We shall see....

Birthday Blessings

We had several days of celebrating Opa's birthday this weekend. Martin and Emily arrived with the girls on Wednesday afternoon, and on his birthday morning (Friday), we had waffles with berry sauce and whipped cream - and a candle. David and Stephanie and Anneke arrived Friday afternoon and we had the first barbecue of the year.
On Saturday, we spent the day at Stevin and Katrina's, had cupcakes with the big 6 and 0 candles;

and opened presents. One gift was a shirt that had travelled across the country to include everyone's handprint and signature on it:

and another gift was a shirt with the big 60 on it:

Naomi and Petra gave their hand-made cards; Naomi's was addressed to the "best Opa ever".

And the BIG and LONG gift was from all of us:

a hammock to relax in!

In the afternoon, we spent an hour at a nearby private pool where the girls had a splashingly good time. They even dared to jump from the diving board!

On Sunday, we continued the celebrating when Opa's brothers and sisters came for lunch. And we had more cake - this time it had all 60 candles on it! There was no problem in getting them blown out with the help of several little people!

No sooner were the candles blown out when they all had to be removed so that we could all have a piece served with ice-cream.

But not before Maria did a taste-test!

It was a busy weekend, but it was very enjoyable - and of course, much too short as far as enjoying the children and grandchildren are concerned. What a blessing they all are!

Laura's Smile

Just want to share where I'm at right now:
I've been immersed in Laura for the last couple of weeks. An album was quickly put together the year after she passed away, for a memory evening with friends and family. I wanted to add to it and journal more, but promised that it would get done "someday". Well, that "day" is here, 27 years later.
There are many other things to do, but now that I've started, I want to finish. At the same time, photos and negatives and albums are being somewhat more organized - at least now I know where I can find most things!
But immersion is what's needed to get the story told; there are so many things to remember to make it more complete! And I suppose I really ought to be scanning and editing all of the photos to make them look "better", and I ought to go digital so that others can have copies, but then the project would have to go on hold some more while I go on another learning curve....
At any rate, I am quite pleased with this layout and I'd like to share it with you.
The journaling defines "in the pink" as someone who is in good health, strong, blooming (- hence the flower page.)
"Laura took her time in developing various physical skills; her illness and surgery earlier in the year were a real set-back. but just as the sun grows stronger, making things grow, Laura grew stronger, and by mid-summer was able to sit alone! Hurray! Another reason to laugh!" The photos show how she needed support to sit - you see the cushions in the high chair? Her laughing face in the centre circle looks quite proud with her new accomplishment! These pictures were taken the summer after she turned one year. She had lengthened but had not gained much weight: at 5 months she was 14lbs3oz, at 15 months she was 15 lbs.
And as I read through several of the memories of Laura in the sympathy cards, it's her smile that people remembered the most!

Behind the Times

We skyped Martin the other day to wish him a happy birthday. While telling him that as I calculated his age, I was feeling old. But we're both older than I thought: seems I left my brain in 2010, and forgot that it's 2011!! I guess I've started to dig in my heels as I approach my milestone birthday - mind you, that's not until next year. I think....

Is there life without the internet?

We were without internet since Wednesday afternoon; not so great when you're expecting email messages and you want to communicate via email.
But I discovered there IS life without the computer and I actually got a little bit more accomplished without having to check the 'puter every now and then! Don't ask me what I did though - seems I can't remember....

Information from the past...

I just read a book, "The Occupied Garden" by Kristen Den Hartog and her sister Tracy Kasaboski. It's a collection of memoirs, gathered from several sources, about their grandparents during WWII, which they realised they needed to collect before the information dies away with that generation. Besides being a reserved couple, their Opa and Oma simply did not talk about that time: it was just too horrible.
It helps me realise why my parents didn't talk much about their experiences either. That last winter, especially, was horrific, with mass starvation, no electricity, no heat. And I understand better why my Dad went underground.
I highly recommend the reading of this book, as well as reading the stories of others on their website: www.TheOccupiedGarden.com.
I also hope to get more information from my Mom, and in-laws, so that the next generation can understand, too. But it's a task we ALL need to undertake - we all know that war is awful, but it's something that happens elsewhere and doesn't impact us greatly, but our grand-/parents actually lived through it, and several went on to face the atrocities of Japanese-trained guerillas in Indonesia.
But how to ask the questions? I'll have to start with the photo album and a "tell me about - ". For instance, last week I found out that my Opa gave up a desired career in the army because he met Oma. And that their romance started when she left the house without her umbrella on a rainy day and he took it to her!

"A Mother Wonders"

I read through a little booklet of poems that we had received when our Laura was born, and this poem came to mind as I enjoyed the photos of our grandgirls on Katrina's blog:

Precious Babe, so small in size,
My one great dream within you lies.
For long before I saw your face
I dreamed and wished as I sewed lace
On your tiny garments.
Now I hold you in my arms,
Bewitched and breathless by your charms -
In truth you are a miracle,
You are so wonderful -
I hope God makes my wish come true,
To make me worthy, Child, of you.
by Grace Mathew Walker

May I truly be worthy of the blessing of my grandgirls, as well as of my children both natural and in law.