Emotional ups and downs are other side effects of cancer, and it doesn't help when you have a summer cold that saps your energy for a couple of weeks.
We were feeling pretty good after the news of no chemotherapy, but today the radiologist said that although he wanted to accomodate our request to book mapping and radiation treatments earlier rather than later, there is still too much fluid in the breast to continue at this point. As the fluid (a result of surgery) and therefore the swelling goes down, the landmarks will change too, and radiation is something that needs to be very accurate.
So the next appointment is for July 14, and if the swelling is down, I'll get mapped out and treatments will begin the following week.
And that puts another kink into the "plans" of life. It's our 40th anniversary in August, and the kids are putting together a celebration, and we've got a cottage booked for the following week. The celebration will go on, but our week may have to accommodate part of the treatment schedule, or, it may be decided that treatments not start until afterwards.
Waiting is not fun, because it really seems as if life has to go on hold, but I think I need to be more intentional with my perspective: I don't want to be a cancer "survivor" because that insinuates I'm a "victim", I do want to be someone who has had to live through cancer.
So whether it's up or down, I choose to live - along with all of life's busyness and all of life's pleasures! I'll do what I can when I can, and enjoy life's little moments as they come along!!
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